Elie's Expositions

A bereaved father blogging for catharsis... and for distraction. Accordingly, you'll see a diverse set of topics and posts here, from the affecting to the analytical to the absurd. Something for everyone, but all, at the core, meeting a personal need.

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Wily-er 11-year-old

For those who aren't reading the local NJ press, you may have missed this item:
Wildlife officials are investigating what could be the first coyote attack on a human in New Jersey following a backyard attack on a toddler that was foiled by an 11-year-old.

Playing in the back yard of his Middletown Township home with his 22-month-old nephew over the weekend, 11-year-old Ryan Palludan first thought the animal that bolted into the yard just before dark was a deer.

But when it grabbed little Liam Sadler in its jaws, Palludan instinctively sprang into action, yelling and kicking at the attacker which was later determined to be a coyote.
The article went on to provide further details. But shockingly, the writer neglected to mention whether the wily beast was wearing a dinner napkin, or whether he used falling rocks, rocket-powered skates, dynamite, or any other such aids in his attack. Nor did this shoddy journalist elaborate on just how the 11-year-old was able to prevail in his battle with the predator. We can only assume that it involved luring him off a cliff, the tried-and-true method of defeating coyotes. Or at least injuring them for a while.

(And I still want to know where those freakin' bandaids come from!!!)


At 4/11/07, 3:11 PM, Blogger Soccer Dad said...

You have ACME's in central NJ don't you?

At 4/11/07, 3:12 PM, Blogger Elie said...

Yes, in fact they're where our local vaad recommends buying chumetz after pesach. Rocket skates can be purchased anywhere as long as they don't use a grain-alcohol based fuel.

At 4/11/07, 3:16 PM, Blogger Steg (dos iz nit der ┼íteg) said...

bleah. that makes me less excited about the prospects for future Central Park Coyotes.

At 4/11/07, 8:03 PM, Blogger socialworker/frustrated mom said...

I definitely did not read that paper, interesting and sad.

At 4/13/07, 11:11 AM, Blogger Jack's Shack said...

There are many coyotes in my area. As a safety measure I carry a Road Runner in my trunk.


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